1. |
Hitherto
01:46
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I know where we go when we die
I went there a couple of times last year
Everyone I was then, they died
I watched the light leave their eyes last year
And I don’t have no guilt that I’ll survive at all
But I see it in you, boy
You need to cut it out
Oh, you should have been dead like seven times by now
Only got like two more lives,
You need to slow it down
I know running for you is muscle memory
Any moment you’re not running you spend wrestling
You need a therapist
Not a referee
I already blew the whistle, you weren’t listening
Can’t have nobody else first in the queue for me
I just pulled up on myself
And baby, she agrees
I no longer say your name
Only hitherto
I no longer think the way I learned to think from you
'Cause I can’t work on me
While I work on you
While you work on you
Who’s gon’ work on me?
Don’t know what to do
Had make a move
No more room to wonder
"Hm, is it meant to be?"
And, I can’t work on me
While I work on you
While you work on you
Who’s gon’ work on me
Don’t know what to do
Had make a move
Boy, I had to choose me
Only other choice was losing
Had to choose me
Only other choice was losing
So I chose me
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2. |
Did U Kno
02:46
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Did you know
Yah yah yah
Oh did you know?
I did
Did you know
I’m in love, boy
Did you know
Oh did you know
So unusual
I don’t fuck with no one but
I fuck
With you
Did you know
I’m in love, boy
Did you know
Oh, did you know too?
If you wanna stay
I’ll stay
If you go outside
Then I’ll play
If you wanna stay
I’ll stay
If you go outside
Then I’ll play
Anywhere
Easy words to say
I’ll sing
I’m in love with you
Like Monique
Loved Oglevee
I’ll stay
And if you go outside then
I’ll play
Anywhere
'Course you know
All I ever do
Is show for you
I’m gay
'Course you know
Blah blah blah
Yeah, of course you know
Better fuckin' know
Ah, but did you know
I’m not wearing nothing under
These jeans
Nothing
'Course you know
I’m worse than Adina
Got a t-shirt but
Ain’t got no panties on
If you wanna stay
I’ll stay
If you go outside
Then I’ll play
If you wanna stay
I’ll stay
If you go outside
Then I’ll play
Anywhere
Easy words to say
I’ll sing
I’m in love with you
Like Monique
Loved Oglevee
I’ll stay
And if you go outside then
I’ll play
Anywhere
If you wanna stay
I’ll stay
If you go outside
Then I’ll play
If you wanna stay
I’ll stay
If you go outside
Then I’ll play
Anywhere
Easy words to say
I’ll sing
I’m in love with you
Like Monique
Loved Oglevee
I’ll stay
And if you go outside then
I’ll play
Anywhere
Anywhere
Anywhere
Did you know?
I did
Did you know?
I did
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3. |
I Killed A Hesher Once
03:48
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Now I know a hit dog hollers
A hesher and a ghost
Imagine that
Was it that Van Tassel woman where you're from?
And does she know that Sleepy Hollow
Is in Florida?
Can’t say you’re too hard headed
Word is you don’t have one
My whole drop D aesthetic
Tested your mettle, huh?
I’m too hardcore for ya
You’re not metal enough
Embarrassed that you found a soft spot
And if it was a lesson, learned a lot
That if it weren’t you
Then it’d be someone else
That’d make things awkward at my holiest haunts
Can’t help but laugh it off
Can’t say you’re too hard headed
Word is you don’t have one
All countenance regretted
Why even bother her
If you're afraid to touch?
Was it a dare or som'n?
Did you bet all or none?
Hesher, I have a hunch
I repelled the hessian front
I killed a hesher once
Yeah, I killed a hesher once
With their own sword and such
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4. |
Hot Pressed
03:41
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I’m hot
Pressed to straight bone
My temper’s short
The day is long
I’m not ready to let go
But it’s too heavy to carry on
My back’s the vehicle
If you shame me
Then you blame us all
I’m not ready to let it go
You can’t save me
You can’t save ‘em all
I’m just saying
I need a second to reckon
I been patient
Now I’m absent the substance
It’s all faded
And peace in public evades me
The good’s latent, my goodness
My grace, jaded
Let’s change places
I live like you, now I’m easily persuaded
That everything is okay
In the same way it’s not
Then maintain it and
Scoff at the way Atlas
And Sisyphus portray it
I'm hot
Pressed to straight bone
My temper's short
The day is long
I’m not ready to let go
But it’s too heavy to carry on
With no way to explain it
The fires burn in such way
That I can’t name them
I feel the pain in a place
That I ain’t tamed yet
I see your face in the flames
And I just hate it
I hate you
Can’t even burn in peace
Hot
Pressed to straight bone
My temper's short
The day is long
I’m not ready to let go
But it’s too heavy to carry on
My back’s the vehicle
If you shame me
Then you blame us all
I’m not ready to let it go
You can’t save me
You can’t save ‘em all
Let’s change places
I live like you, now I’m easily
Persuaded
To lose the fight in me
Easily placated
I’ll find it difficult
Making my own way
Now undo me
I can’t take it
With no way to explain it
The fires burn in such way
That I can’t name them
I feel the pain in a place
That I ain’t tamed yet
I see your face in the flames
And I just hate it
I hate you
Can’t even burn in peace
I'm hot
Pressed to straight bone
My temper's short
The day is long
I’m not ready to let go
But it’s too heavy to carry on
My back’s the vehicle
If you shame me
Then you blame us all
I’m not ready to let go
You can’t save me
You can’t save ‘em all
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5. |
Lizard Brain
03:18
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Leave me alone.
Please just let me be.
Did you read the sign?
Of course you didn't.
Please understand
It's you, it's not me
I've got way too much to do
With my memory
And you ain't ready yet.
What good's the altitude without the azimuth?
I don't want to hear "I'm too passionate."
For someone so high up, you're directionless
Baby
I don't think with my lizard brain (Nope)
My eyes are up here (My eyes are up here)
Best leave while you can run away (Best leave while you can run away)
Or did you not hear - (You must have not heard, huh?)
That I'm pretty cold-blooded, babe? (I'm pretty cold-blooded, babe)
And I can taste fear (And I can taste fear)
You don't have the constitution, babe (You don't have the constitution, babe)
Ain't tough enough
I'd eat you up
I don't have it left inside of me
To teach anyone else to love me near as easily as I love me
Pray you give 'em hell, but please do not include me in that number
Oh my god
Don't choose to stay
I'll choose the mission
Your eyes for me
Are not the vision
What did I say, hmm?
You didn't listen
Details in the dossier
Bet you missed it
And you ain't ready yet.
What good's the altitude without the azimuth?
I don't want to hear "I'm too passionate."
For someone so high up, you're directionless, baby
I don't think with my lizard brain (Nope)
My eyes are up here (My eyes are up here)
Best leave while you can run away (Best leave while you can run away)
Or did you not hear - (You must have not heard, huh?)
That I'm pretty cold-blooded, babe? (I'm pretty cold-blooded, babe)
And I can taste fear (And I can taste fear)
You don't have the constitution, babe (You don't have the constitution, babe)
Ain't tough enough
I'd eat you up
I don't think with my lizard brain (Nope)
My eyes are up here (My eyes are up here)
Best leave while you can run away (Best leave while you can run away)
Or did you not hear? (You must have not heard, huh?)
That I'm pretty cold-blooded, babe? (I'm pretty cold-blooded, babe)
And I can taste fear (And I can taste fear)
You don't have the constitution, babe (You don't have the constitution, babe)
Ain't tough enough
I'd eat you up
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Mahawam Oakland, California
Mahawam is the studio recording and performance outlet for Oakland based musician, songwriter, and producer Malik Mays. Black and queer, among many things, the 30 year old’s work combs the borders and unexplored terrain of self and other, with themes of discovery, reclamation, and purpose through a deeply considered, intersectional lens. ... more
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